I am a diehard Indianapolis Colts fan who will treat this sunday's game against the New England Patriots as my Easter. The only thing I praise on Sundays, sadly, is the NFL. In that case, you can call the six days leading up to the big game Sunday my lent. One of my biggest pet peeves and guilty pleasures (wait-does that mean I hate myself?) is midweek football analysis. In my down time, I have no problem turning on day time ESPN and listening to the pundits claim talk about anything and everything. And I love to hate it, because although I can't get enough of people talking about what I'm thinking about, I hate to hear previews. I am a product of the world I live in, and I need action, not non-action (duh, sorry).
As a sports fan, I am pulling myself away from sports television until Sunday at 4:15, when the game starts. I'm giving up ESPN this week for my lent, and I think I'm going to do it. I'm still going to watch the Office, Weeds, Californication and It's Always Sunny, but I'm tuning out ESPN. I'm tuning out the debates on which quarterback is better (Manning, obviously. Have you seen some of the throws he makes? His combination of velocity and accuracy makes Tom Brady look like he's throwing a game of 500 in his back yard). I'm tuning out Skip Bayless and his opponents forced arguments for the sake of filling up minutes. I'm tuning out who Sean Salisbury thinks has better zone coverage (Cover 2, baby). I'm even turning out Mike Fucking Ditka, his mustache and his referrals to the '85 bears (Fuck you, fuck Brian Piccalo).
I'm not retracting my fandom, I'm just protesting the garbage. I'm the chinaman holding the white flag in Tiennamen Square, and Pregame Banter is my fucking tank. I'm going to stand up and fight the power, even if it kills me.
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